Our Baby
Dear Oliver,
I want to write you this letter to help you understand some of the things that have happened and to share my love for you, which has guided every choice I’ve made. Life has been complicated lately, and I feel it’s important to explain what’s been going on so that you know how much I care about you and how hard I’ve fought to protect you.
Your dad rarely cared for you when you were little; he would often choose to play video games instead of spending time interacting with you. Mom tried hard to make up for his lack of involvement, but one day, everything changed. After an argument, your dad tried to keep you away from me by kicking me, and you cried so hard in his arm that it broke my heart. In that moment, I knew I couldn’t let anything like that happen again. Since then, I’ve had to make tough choices to keep you safe and ensure you have the love and care you deserve.
I wanted to make sure you had a stable, loving environment where your needs were always met with family. I’ve been the one providing your home, buying your essentials, and managing so much of your daily care—like getting your food, diapers, and clothes ready. I’ve spent my days and nights ensuring you are fed, safe, loved, and comforted, even when I felt tired and overwhelmed.
Right now, we’re working through a court process to figure out the best way to care for you moving forward. It hasn’t been easy, But through it all, my love for you has never wavered. You are the reason I keep going, even when things feel difficult.
One day, you may hear things about this time that might confuse you. I want you to know that none of this is your fault. Mom tried everything I can to get you the best. You are a wonderful, bright baby and you bring so much joy to my life. Every decision I’ve made has been with your happiness and safety in mind, even when it wasn’t easy for me. I hope that when you get older, you’ll be able to see and understand everything Mom has shared on this website. It wasn't easy for mom, but mom will keep strong because of you.
Life might not look exactly the way I imagined, but I promise to keep doing everything I can to give you the love and stability you deserve. You are my world, Oliver, and I am so proud of the amazing person you will become. No matter what, I will always be here for you, loving you, supporting you, and cheering you on.
With all my love,
Mom
01/13/2025
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Custody and Parenting Time:
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I am currently breastfeeding my child and want a custody schedule that ensures stability and minimizes frequent transitions. Sole physical custody - Other party has Oliver every other Saturday Sunday Monday Tuesday night. Drop off at daycare Wednesday morning. So we would have Sunday alternative for each party.
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The proposed parenting plan is complicated by his work hours. The plan he proposed, from Sunday morning to Wednesday morning, would result in significantly unequal free time with our child. It leaves only Saturday for the mother, who regularly handles pickups and drop-offs. Since Oliver goes to bed around 9:30 PM, this would leave the mother, despite her personal time, only 6:30 PM to 9:30 PM—just three hours a day—to bond with Oliver, which adds to total of 3*3 + 15 = 24hrs. While he got three free days which is 15*3=45hrs. Also, Sunday is the only day my parents are off from work. To get rid of child support, he is being shameless.
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I should be granted more parenting time. If we can get sole, It's important I want sole custody start from week of 1/13/2024 since our Spring Festival lies on 1/27/2024.
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I can be flexible by giving him the option to pick up on Monday afternoon and drop off on Wednesday morning if you think this plan is more doable.
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He never exercised his visitation rights. On 12/20, I informed him that he could visit anytime, but instead, he threatened to take the baby away and falsely claimed to his lawyer that I had denied him parenting time. He was also made aware of the new daycare arrangement starting 12/21 but never visited. Instead, he simply made a phone call to add himself to the daycare records.
High-Conflict Parenting:
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Co-parenting with my ex has been challenging due to his lack of cooperation and ongoing conflict.
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I want to show the court that we are high-conflict parents, as this impacts my ability to effectively co-parent.
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High conflict mediator needed.
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Financial Disputes:
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My ex has not repaid a loan I provided to him with a 1% interest rate, which I am pursuing in a separate lawsuit.
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I also want him to share responsibility for all past medical bills since I paid for all the necessities expenses related to our child.
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Childcare Arrangements:
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I am willing to cover daycare costs myself, but if my ex prefers, he can arrange daycare and handle pickups and drop-offs.
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I want to ensure my child’s daycare situation is stable and reliable, regardless of who is responsible.
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Future Relocation:
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I am planning to relocate within Omaha once this custody case is settled. My current property (4667) is vacant, and I want to move forward with establishing a new home for my child and me.
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Tax Purpose:
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I respectfully request my eligibility to file taxes as single. File tax return even years.
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Parenting plan outcome 3: (maybe feasible without Jefferey's mom intervention in future)
I am willing to take full responsibility for the child's upbringing and care by seeking sole legal and physical custody with his visitation rights, and in return, I am prepared to waive any request for child support.
Concern:
Since I disrupted his carefree lifestyle, I fear he may harbor resentment toward Oliver, and I cannot bear even the slightest risk of Oliver being harmed. He withheld Oliver from me due to a personal disagreement and potentially could caused harm to him in the process.He knows how deeply I care for Oliver, and he is using him as a means to manipulate me. Hearing Oliver cry like that was the most heartbreaking moment I've ever experienced, and I am determined never to let that happen again.